Hi friends! April showers HAVE to bring May flowers.

Here’s the brain dump for the month…

What a freaking month – whew. We made it mama! Bless.

It all started with some shattering news. Easter weekend. I am processing everything and moving through it with complete grace for myself and others, steady and firm in my faith, and staying true to my character and the person I am. I just sit in the feelings as they come and just take it one day at time. Some days are really intense and uncomfortable and others are better. I know the only way through it is to just feel it all… every single emotion. Yay.

People that just sit in the ditch with you are the best. There is SO much love in just sitting with someone as they go through life. Not fixing, no repairing…. just sitting.

Speaking of people sitting in ditch with you… my best friend, Ragan, booked a flight when she heard the news. It is a moment I will forever be grateful for. It made me feel so loved. I still cannot talk about it (or type about it in this case) without getting emotional. I pray and hope everyone can experience a friendship like this one day. Quality time with your best friend can fix just about anything.

Ragan and I painted a canvas when she was here. It was my first time painting over plaster. It turned out so good! I need to do another one – just trying to figure out what colors I want to do.

Music and crafts = therapy.

Duke does not like Harry Potter – lol! He loves Marshals though. Yes, he watches TV like a human.

Speaking of dogs… thank you Jesus for my two fur babes. They brought me so much comfort this month when my heart was hurting and the tears were flowing. They also brought me a lot of laughter too. Who rescued who again?

Between my family, friends, dogs, and the people that have just loved on me this month – thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything. There are not enough words to describe my gratitude and what it has meant to me.

Goodness… so many tears writing this blog post… happy and sad tears. We can all agree the emotions are high around here and that is okay. I am learning about the strength in vulnerability.

Speaking of strengths…. I am a sensitive, gentle, caring, and a very kind person. For a long time I thought those were some of my weaknesses. Not anymore. They are my greatest strengths. It is who I am. I swear it is woven into my DNA. I love BIG and I deeply care for the people in my life. I wouldn’t change that for anything… not even to protect my heart from the heartbreaks and let downs. It sounds simple, but YOU get to decide how you show up and treat people.

Your character is revealed during life’s most trying moments. Your character is also built during life’s most trying moments. How you move forward when life knocks you on your ass says EVERYTHING about who you are at your core.

The truth sets EVERYONE free…. if you let it.

The Holy Spirit has quite the sense of humor and can be very funny at times. That is all I am going to say about that.

April was filled with a lot of prayers, so much grace, forgiveness and more prayers. May will be too.

May will also be filled with bum energy drinks… they have me in a chokehold. Isn’t that what the young kids say these days?? I also hope May is filled with days in the sun with my people. Ya girl needs a tan!

A big thing that happened in April was My nephew turned EIGHT!! Gosh, I love him so much and am so proud of him. He is hilarious, witty, and so sweet. What a privilege and joy it is to watch him grow up. Thank you Jesus for B.

Mama got some new wheels… does anyone else feel like a real life adult when you buy a set of tires?

A plant update: I got new flowers and a few other plants from a local nursey. They are all so beautiful! Putting it out there now – one day I will have a cottage garden filled with flowers.

Random – I have been seeing SO MANY LADYBUGS!! On my car, house, windows, and even landing on me… everywhere! Spiritually they can represent protection, good luck, divine grace and positive transformation. Oh, cardinals too. I swear it’s my grandmas showing me they are with me and that is just so comforting with everything I have been going through this month.

I never take anything for granted. I have a heart of gratitude. Months like this just take my gratitude to another level. I am absolutely grateful for it all – the good, bad and ugly of life.

I know God’s hand is completely in my situation. He is not only working on my heart, other people’s too. Hearts break so light can come in and shine on the parts that need healing/repair. My faith is being tested in BIG ways. Funny thing is I asked God to strengthen my faith in my relationships and future about six months ago. Ask and you shall receive… L O freaking L.

Anyway, love your people and cherish the time with them. You never know when it will be the last.

Make choices you can be proud of and be BRAVE! You’ve got this – I promise.

Until next time,

Amanda